The Other Side of Moving into University

I knew that I wanted to document this process, more than anything else so that I could always look back on it and remember every thought and feeling that I had about the experience. The fact that I am already referring to certain parts and processes in the past tense is strange. It's odd to think that I have already experienced some parts of university that I will never experience again and I am not even 24 hours in to the process. 

 I embarked on this journey feeling extremely over prepared. Even at almost 19 years old I am as naive as a child on their first day at school. 

 I made lists and budgeted for things I would need; I filled notebooks and folders doing so. I changed my mind about so many things that I felt invisible! I had decided to live at home then decided to move away. I considered every possible outcome and made the decision I thought was best and I am confident I made the right choice but nothing can prepare you for what this feels like. 

 I was no stranger to the apprehension and, in this instance, I knew the anxiety I was feeling was no condition that my brain had tricked me into, it was completely natural. I knew this. 

 It began the on Saturday night. I had picked up my keys and partially moved in, the rest to be completed the next day. It hit me that evening that in a few hours time, I'd have to say goodbye to my dog and that we would no longer be living in the same house. I would no longer be woken every morning by her scratching at my door for a cuddle. It's funny the things that get you.

 I didn't ever consider in all of my planning that moving to university might be slightly unpleasant. I had accepted that I was a bit of an introvert and would take a little while to integrate, but I could expect the feelings I felt when I was finally moved in and settled. 

 It's exciting, moving somewhere new, to a completely different environment and atmosphere. But it's also extremely overwhelming. I can't describe the feeling of when your mum and dad get back into the car and drive away and you're left in this new place, completely alone for the first time. 

 I didn't expect to feel so unsettled. I had prepared everything, surely? 

The slightest thing just made me cry. I couldn't explain why I was crying, not to my boyfriend or anyone. I'd calm down and then suddenly be in tears again. I wasn't even sad, or homesick. I didn't want to go back home and I didn't dislike my room or house mates, I was just utterly overwhelmed. 

 Nobody really talks about how it actually feels to move into halls. 

 Every YouTube video I have watched or blog post I have read kind of brushes over it. 

 I didn't even indicate to anyone except my boyfriend that this was happening, that I was sat alone in my bedroom completely without control of my emotions. But I received a message from my old manager and work friend explaining that while the first night is always hard, it gets much better! 

 It helped me so much to know that this is normal, and having talked openly about it to my housemates I know that every single one of us went through this on our first night. 

 When you think about it, it's to be expected. 

 When you move into university halls, everything shifts. Everything changes. 

 You live somewhere new, often miles away from home, you're studying something new and you know virtually nobody. No one can go through that kind of change in one second and not be phased by it. 

 I still have moments now where I feel a little emotional and ache to give my dog a cuddle, but home will still be there if you need to get back for a weekend. 

 I wanted to write this to document the feeling and also so that anyone who might read this and think they're alone can know that everyone gets upset and unsettled. It's to be expected. 

I Changed My Hair... Again

I have been growing my hair then cutting and it and growing it again for about 3 years now. I love the idea of having long, gorgeous hair that everyone would be jealous off but the reality is, it just doesn't look good on me. 

 I've recently just grown to hate it and I found myself wearing my hair in a ponytail most of the time simply because it kept it all out of my face.

 It's been 2 and a half years since I had my first dramatic hair cut since childhood. Recently I've been thinking about it and how both times I've cut my hair short, I've loved it. And also how every time I have it long, I end up hating it. 

 I have been at my most confident when I've felt good about my hair. 
 I have felt the best about my hair when it is short and blonde. 

 Short hair is easy to style, there's a lot you can do with it and it takes very little maintaining. So I made up my mind, I was going to chop it all off again. 

 Having recently moved to Worcester for University, I looked for a new, local place to try out. My first stop was Tony & Guys but I couldn't get an appointment there within the next month for love nor money. I couldn't seem to get in contact with other hair salons without phoning, (I have a weird phobia of talking on the phone. Don't judge me, I'm working on it just not right now,) so I was kind of despairing on what to do. 

 Last Sunday I had a moment that affected my week dramatically and to deal with it, I knew I needed to cut my hair. It was all I could think about, every time I got upset I was just like, 'I need someone to cut my hair!' 

 I said to one of my flatmates at one point, "If someone doesn't cut my hair soon, I'm going to do it myself." 

 Scared I'd ruin what little good hair I had, I decided the only think left to do would be to get in touch with where I used to work which I could get to by train. 

 So, one last minute appointment and a 50 minute train ride later, I found myself back where I used to call home ready to leave a whole new woman. 

 The whole round trip took me about 6 hours but it was so worth it. 

I now have short blonde hair again and I'm SO happy about it! I want to try and style it either curly or wavy each day and just play around with it while it's short. I also am planning to maintain the length and have it cut more regularly which is where I have failed every time I've done this before. 

 I didn't go too blonde, I wanted the change to be gradual and I can add more blonde at a later date if I fancy it. More than anything I just wanted to look and feel different. It's always such a weight lifted when you change your style. 

after

 I hope to share more posts about what I do with my new style very soon, see you next week! 

before

Alice by Christina Henry | Book Review

I read both Alice and The Red Queen during my last weeks of the Summer and, at first, I wasn't sure whether I liked it at all. 

 Alice in Wonderland has become one of my favourite stories and ideas. I would say I'm quite attached to the idea of a wonderful, magical land where nothing makes sense. This book duo takes the familiar story to a very dark place. If you're easily put off by horrific tales and especially attached to Alice in Wonderland, I'd maybe advise you to give this retelling a miss.

 I've recently found my love for retellings of traditional stories after exploring Angela Carter's work. I loved the idea of an Alice in Wonderland with a twist. While I wasn't sure about it at first, I've realised with time just how clever this book is. 

 The characters are familiar, the world is not. The traditional rabbit hole seems to have been replaced by a dirty, diseased river Alice and her companion, Hatcher, must swim through and the quest to kill the Jabberwocky has been complicated by what appears to be Henry's allusion to sex trafficking. 

 Here is where I must pull in a trigger warning because this is not a pleasant book to read. I myself found it quite difficult to read some parts. There is fairly graphic reference to rape and women being bought and sold for sexual exploitation. At first, I didn't like this at all; my favourite childhood story being twisted into a very adult, very unpleasant reality. However, the more I think about it, the more praise I have for Henry's message. 

 The reality of Alice in Wonderland is that even the original was based on some awful thing; drugs and alcohol for one. 

 It can only be celebrated that a writer would use such a story to put out a powerful message about a social issue and while it is uncomfortable to read at times, it is done as tastefully as it possibly could be considering the nature of what some women go through. 

 Henry uses the familiar characters of the Caterpillar and the Cheshire Cat renamed simply as Cheshire. These are characters we didn't fully trust in the original novel and neither should we trust them here. 

 The reality of Alice in Wonderland is that the world they are in seems like a wonderful dream but it has an eerie feel to it that suggests Alice isn't safe. Henry uses that in a way that hasn't been explored before but it works. If you are attached to the nature of Alice in Wonderland, try to see this separately from the original. 

 I did read the sequel, The Red Queen, but I didn't enjoy that as much as I enjoyed Alice. The message in Alice is very clear and has a lot of impact. 

 I would recommend giving it a try but it is not for the faint hearted. 

Cosying Up Your University Room.

Hello Friends, after a hectic couple of weeks I am back with a Sunday post and a few prepared and up my sleeve to see us through! 

 I have completed my first week of lectures at University which feels crazy to say when I wrote so many posts so recently about it being in the future. It's now real and it's very overwhelming. 

 I have written a post about how overwhelming it really is moving into university, but now that I am happy and settled, I didn't want that to be my first University Life post! It will go public when the time is right, but not just yet. Today I wanted to share my top tips about how to make halls feel more like home!

 There are still some little bits I want to get for my room, but I'm just going to share a couple of things that you might find helpful if you're struggling to settle into your new little space. 

 A must for me was bringing some of my favourite stuffed toys.

 Regretfully, I couldn't bring the whole gang and so some of my furry friends had to stay home... but I narrowed it down to two and I'm going to introduce you to them now!

 This is Pink Teddy and Archibald (3 guesses who is who.) Pink Teddy and I met when I was very small, hence the unimaginative name, but she has been my closest friend for all of these years and she just had to come with me. Archibald I actually built myself at the infamous Build-a-Bear workshop, (not sponsered although I'd be more than happy to work with those guys if they ever got in touch!) He's so cool and just makes me laugh because the only clothing I could afford for him on my 14th birthday was a pare of pink heart print pants because, of course, he couldn't go naked all the way home! 

 Having some cuddly toys close is such a comfort and will always warm your heart, no matter how 'grown up' you think you are.

Another thing that came in handy for me was this reed diffuser. When you first move your stuff into halls the smell is very unfamiliar. Every home has it's own smell and so a foreign smell can be very unsettling, even if it's not remarkably unpleasant! This is a christmasy scent from Primark Homeware. I love Christmas and so, I figured, if my room started to smell Christmasy it might be some comfort to me. 

 It's important to have little items dotted around that will remind you of home. I brought books and mugs with me so that when I cosy up in bed with a nice cup of coffee, it feels cosy and not painfully Uni-Like with the same mug over and over again! 

 And, for when everything gets terribly exhausting, it's nice to have a small supply of your favourite alcoholic beverage to have a wind down with your flat mates (drink in moderation!) 

Putting up photographs is always a good idea. I have covered the provided cork board with pictures of old friends and my family as a little comfort blanket when I miss home. But I also dedicated a corner of this display to 8 powerful women who have inspired me over the years. To name a few, we have Judy Gardland who starred in my favourite childhood film, The Wizard of Oz. We also have Miss Taylor Swift who has been my favourite musician since I was 8. And some of my favourite songwriters Alanis Morissette, Gabrielle Aplin and Sara Bareilles. This is such a comfort for when I have down days and feel a lack of motivation. I can look up at those women who worked hard for their careers and it gives me the push to keep going. 

 There are many other ways you can make a uni room feel more like home so if these ideas don't work for you, keep reading other blogs, (that's where I got most of my inspiration from,) and I recommend Lucy Moon on YouTube for more ideas, she's fab! 


 Thank you so much for reading, I'll see you next week and Good Luck for your own University endeavours.