We grow up with images of slim, perfectly airbrushed women being shoved in our faces and assume that that is the correct way to look. As a result of this people assume that anyone with a thin body is confident and happy with the way they look. We also assume that that is what everyone thinks is beautiful which causes girls who are slightly curvier than those women to feel insecure in themselves. We are all aware of this issue and that is not where this blog post is going because I honestly think that the issue of curvier girls being insecure about their weight isn't as apparent now as it was a few years ago. Plus, I don't relate to that kind of insecurity that much so I wouldn't feel comfortable writing about it. Instead I want to bring to your attention how uncomfortable thinner girls can feel about their bodies because people seem to think that if you are thin you don't have any insecurities at all.
There is such a lack of empathy for slim girls and it makes me so angry. There are so many people promoting self confidence for bigger girls which is amazing and such a good thing but who said they are the only people to feel insecure? Shouldn't we be encouraging bodily confidence for people of all shapes and sizes and not making it out to be accessible to one specific body type?
I have battled with my weight every since I was in primary school. People are always surprised when I confess that I am insecure with they way my body looks; it's as if I don't have a right to feel uncomfortable with myself just because I'm small. I firstly began to feel uncomfortable at the age of 9 when one of my teachers openly asked me in front of other students whether I was eating properly because my arms and legs looked 'too skinny.' I noticed this kind of prejudice again when I was 10 when a pupil slightly older than me referred to me as being 'so anorexic.' I again began to feel even more paranoid when I started working and a lady I worked with would constantly check what I was having for lunch and how I'd eaten in the week because she was convinced I had some sort of eating disorder. This kind of harassment began again when my doctor worked out my BMI to be less than it should be for my age and decided I needed counselling despite both myself and my parents insisting that I was eating properly.
Being anorexic is something I have been accused of a lot. I don't think there is a single person in my life, who I'm not related to, who hasn't at some point accused me of starving myself or having an unhealthy attitude to food. This I don't understand because it's usually the people who have watched me eat huge amounts of food or even had meals with me. I want to be really careful when writing this paragraph because mental illness is an issue very close to my heart and I don't want to upset anybody or come across as being disrespectful. But I find this offensive, not only to me, but to the people who genuinely suffer from these illnesses. I know that if I was to have one of these disorders and someone pestered me about what I was eating I would just try to hide it even more. You can't react to mental illness in that way! One of the worst things you can do is walk up to someone's face and accuse them of starving themselves. If you really, genuinely suspect that then talk to their parents, or to a teacher or work colleague or even to their doctor. Never walk up to somebodies face if you suspect that they're mentally ill and accuse them of that because it's like lighting a fuse.
One thing I am sick of even more so than being called 'Skinny,' is being made to feel like I don't have a right to dislike my body. If I say to people I want to eat more healthily or even start working out properly they automatically assume that it's because I want to lose weight and I get bombarded with comments like: "but you're so skinny," or, "I would kill to be as skinny as you" or even "is that why you're so skinny?" I'm sorry but why does that have to be the reason I want to get fit or be more healthy? I'll tell you why I'm planning on eating healthier and joining gym: because I want to.
Why is that not a good enough reason?
One thing people don't understand is that "skinny" is NOT a compliment. You would be mortified if somebody walked up to a curvy girl and said "why are you so fat?" and rightly so because that is a disgusting, vile comment to make. Even though curvy portrays the same image it's a nicer way to say it. It's the same with calling someone skinny, it's a horrible word. The difference between calling someone skinny and calling them slim is that skinny implies that they are too thin. It's an unappealing word that suggests you look unhealthy or unattractive. One problem with my generation especially is that we are less quick to think about what we say before we say it. Just by saying 'You're so slim' rather than 'you're so skinny' you automatically avoid hitting any nerve. It's so much kinder and much more of a compliment. Just think about how your words come across before you say them. Even though your intentions are good and you're trying to pay someone a compliment, it comes off as more of an insult and it's just not nice!
Like I mentioned previously, there has been a recent rise in media protest against curvier girls feeling insecure about their bodies which is something I support and encourage. However, it does portray that slimmer girls don't have a right to feel uncomfortable or even that they shouldn't be encouraged to feel comfortable too.
There were many reason's why 'About That Bass' by Meghan Trainor offended me immensely when I first heard it. Not only because thinner girls were described as 'skinny b*tches' but also because of how disgusting the message from that song actually is and it's disguised behind the fact that it's supporting body confidence. The lyric 'boys like a little more booty to hold tonight' ruins the whole message for me. This is also something I have seen all over the media that boys like curvier girls and boys like to be able to grab something. I'm sorry but why are we basing our self worth over what men want? It's our body not theirs! Not only does that song completely defeat the object of promoting bodily confidence by slamming slim girls but it gives out the message for the wrong reasons and I can't believe people actually use it as a mantra to live by.
The only thing girls should really be worrying about is how they feel about their body. Not what the media says they should think or what boys think. It's your body so get yourself to a place where you are comfortable with it.
Yes, I am quite slim and so I don't feel like I need to lose any weight but I still worry about how my body looks sometimes. I try to work out as much as possible because I worry that my body doesn't look very nice. This probably stems back from all of the comments I've had regarding anorexia over the years and so I try to make sure everything is toned and looks nice because I've been made to feel so insecure about it.
Another false message the media gives us nowadays is that you shouldn't want to lose weight and wanting to lose weight is unhealthy. Do you know what? Some people may disagree with me but if you want to lose weight you go ahead and do that. So long as it's a healthy amount and you go about it in a healthy way then go for it. It's nobody else's business. And don't let anyone convince you that you need a reason to want to change the way you look. The only reason you need is 'because I want to.'
Feeling confident about yourself and the way you look is so crucial when you get older and you should be able to feel and do whatever you want in order to achieve that confidence.
Stop comparing yourself to other people and stop commenting on other people's bodies because we're all different and pointing out other people's body shapes only makes us all feel more insecure.
And please don't ever use the words: skinny, fat, huge, anorexic, or disgusting to describe anyone's body because its disrespectful and dangerous to use that terminology... and really mean. Chloe x.
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