Security Blankets.

Good evening my lovely friends,
After my introductory piece last night I was eager to post something a bit more meaningful so that you can really see whether or not this blog is for you. This is the subject that I've been thinking about most recently and it's actually something that made me decide for sure that I wanted, if not needed, to start my own blog. You see I think about things like this very often and can't help but feel useless because I can't make these feelings impact society in any way, shape or form. So, dear reader, I hope this post inspires you and makes all the time I've wasted pondering over it worth while. 

 I'm pretty sure every single child I have ever met has/had some sort of security blanket. It may well have been an actual blanket or maybe a stuffed animal or something so simple as a lucky button or some kids had rabbit foots at my primary school which always kind of freaked me out a bit. Whatever it was, we all had them, right? My security blanket was this little pink bear that I got when I was roughly about 3. I named her, (inventive name alert!) Pink Teddy. I used to sleep next to her in bed and even take her to school on days where I wasn't feeling to confident about going; I've always struggled with social anxiety and when your 4 it helps to have a cuddly friend to go on difficult journeys with you. As children, we kept these things because they made us feel safe. Maybe they smelled like home or maybe they just felt at home in our pockets or in our arms. I still have Pink Teddy now; in fact she is sat right next to me in bed as I write this post. However, I'm not quite so attached to her now as I was when I was a child. 

 Growing up is HARD. Quite often we are exposed to certain pressures that result in us losing that sense of security. It's no longer socially acceptable to carry around a bright pink teddy bear in your school bag just because you've had a rough few days. It becomes harder and harder to feel safe and at home when constantly you're being given reasons to feel anxious and unsettled. I was no stranger to this. I went through issues like most girls my age and I struggle to remember times in the last 4 years where I have felt safe and happy. During your teenage years you have to seek security from other people. No matter how much you want to be, you simply cannot be completely independent. You need to have friends around you that you can talk to about your insecurities because they can no longer be cured by snuggling down with a book and your favourite blanket. This was hard for me to get my head around because talking about problems is very hard for me and I tried to tackle everything by myself. That made me very down for a very long time and as a result I'm now dealing with issues that I have been dealing with for a very long time simply because I didn't realise that it is okay to need people. Additionally; if, like in my case, the people you feel you desperately need turn their backs on you, you don't really need them. They are not your security blanket. But you will find someone who can be. 

 Rejection and heartbreak can mean that you never feel safe or loved. I felt like I wasn't good enough for a very long time. But recently I let a person into my life that has honestly changed it for the better. I feel so safe around them and so happy and comfortable that I feel almost as secure as I did when I was a kid. That's a safety I haven't felt for a very long time and I love this person with all my heart, so much that I don't even know how to describe it. Having felt that kind of intense love, I can't help but get angry when I see how people really treat the people they say they love. 

 Let me ask you something: When you were a child, would you have let your security blanket fall from your pocket and get trampled in the mud then leave it there to get ruined? Of course not! That would have broken your heart and you wouldn't have slept for weeks! So why would you allow the person you love to sit and feel discarded by something you've done, a mistake you made, and not feel anything? How can you expect to feel that kind of safety and gratitude and respect if you can't respect the one who's giving it to you! The point I'm trying to make here is kind of linked to Karma. You see, the person I love, I would quite literally die inside if anything happened to them and so if I hurt them, I would feel a kind of guilt that wouldn't ever go away. It pains me to see lovers scream harsh words to each other when arguing. Words can never be taken back. You would never have got a pair of scissors and cut your security blanket to shreds. Why do that to a person? Why fall so deeply and madly in love with somebody and then let them get hurt? It's our duty to take care of the people in our lives and be security blankets for each other. 

 So when you find that person who makes you feel like you have a security blanket again, hold them as close as you possibly can and never ever let go. If you've already found them, go and give them a massive cuddle right now. I mean it. Go. Let me tell you, it only takes one person to show you why your life is totally worth living; it's completely okay to admit you need someone to show you that. 

 So I'm going to round this up now: all in all, we all have people in our lives that make us feel safe and loved. These people need to feel safe and loved to. It's our duty as good people to take care of each other and spread the love! 

Goodnight readers, 
Chloe.